Thursday, November 3, 2011
Why do you live so far away?? Gramma said that you were meeting us half-way. That sounded good. Until Oscar pointed out that we would still have to drive home. I suppose the whole day would have been better if we had left Papa at home. He was in a bad mood.
Gramma told him that she planned to drive the first half since she knew he was tired and his neck was hurting, but he insisted on driving. I will tell you once again that I am not a fan of road trips. I am especially not a fan of road trips in Gramma's car. I don't care where I try to sit or lie down I can see trucks and cars whizzing by and I do not like it!! Oscar insists on sitting in the front seat with Gramma. Emmy sits on top of Oscar. Oscar says that this is the way they always ride and for the rest of us dogs to find another seat. He is so bossy. I prefer to ride in Gramma's arms, with my face buried in her neck. She will pet me and tell me everything is alright and I feel safe in this position.
Gramma has managed to get all three of us dogs in her lap before. But their were five of us dogs on this trip. Max, the new puppy wanted to ride in Gramma's arms. I know that he might look like me when I was a mere pup, but, that does not mean he can take my place! The puppy called Toni was jumping and leaping and going to the front and then to the back and creating havoc. There was a time when Gramma had all five of us in her lap. She had put our favorite big blanket in the back of the car, along with a kennel for new puppy, Max. Gramma got tire of all of us in her lap and she made all of us get in the back. New puppy, Max, went to sleep and I tried to stay still ..... really I did. Papa couldn't seem to keep the wheels off those kerdunkity things on the side of the road. Every time he hit them it scared me and I would jump into the front to Gramma. Gramma would ask Papa to let her drive, but he would say he was fine.
Gramma and Papa were not using happy voices and Papa hit the kerdunkity things one last time and I accidentally clawed Gramma when I jumped into her lap. She yelled at Papa to pull over and then she took the wheel. I must say that the ride was much smoother with Gramma behind the wheel. We can keep that between us, okay?
All of dogs finally went to sleep and we woke up, Gramma was pulling into a parking lot. I wondered if us dogs were suppose to get out and do our business, because Gramma was attaching leads to our harnesses. I looked up and I SAW YOU!!!!!!! You were right there at my window. I was so happy to see you, my boy. You did not reach for the new puppy, Max, no you did not! You wanted to see me!
The trip home was better. Papa tried to drive again and Gramma made him pull over again and he slept. Gramma was not happy with his behavior. He wanted to make you and your mom drive the whole way and Gramma wanted you to be able to get Max as soon as possible so that he would not be so attached to her. Gramma muttered while she drove. Papa can't hear very well anyway and he was sleeping, so he didn't hear all the things she said ......... but us dogs did. She wasn't happy, that's all I am going to say.
Us dogs were happy to get home. The puppy called Toni and I went into the back yard and ran and ran. We were worried that we wouldn't be able to sleep, since we slept all day in the car, but we did! I wish I could have played with you when I saw you. I was happy to see Max go home with you. I told him that he had to be good and play nice with you. He will grow and then he can protect you, too. Gramma says that he is happy to be with you and that he plays with you. She did say that your mom was really smitten by Max. That's okay, cause I know that you will always love me the best. I mean, what's not to love?
Your best dog, Wall-E
Friday, October 21, 2011
Your new puppy, Max, sure does like to sleep. I enjoy a quality nap myself. I like to sit close to Gramma while she works on the computer and have a nice little snooze. I can feel her hand pet me from time to time and her leg is nice and warm. Oscar likes to be alone while he naps and the girl dogs like to lay in the sun, while us boy dogs like to be inside. We like to be close to Gramma, you know. In case she might need us. To protect her.
I was enjoying just such a nap yesterday with Max asleep behind me. He got up and then turned around to get comfortable, then went back to sleep. He likes to be close to Gramma, too. He is a boy dog, like me and Oscar.
Gramma sure does like to take pictures of Max while he sleeps.
She even takes his picture while she holds him and he sleeps.
Last night she put him in a wash bucket and put it right beside the bed. She said she was tired of having to go all the way into the store to get him out of his kennel when he cried. Gramma says that he has separation anxiety. I don't know what that is, do you? Oscar says that he was taken from his mother too soon. Wait ......... that can happen? I don't remember my dog mother ....... did you ever see my dog mother? Did she look like me, or do I look like her? What about my dog father? Oh, no, do I have that anxiety thing, too? Will I need to have a shot? Do they have shots for that? Oh, I hope I don't have it. I can't get it from the puppy, Max, can I?
Gramma was laughing at me! She told me that I was fine and that she would take care of me. She said that I was just have a nervous personality. Is that a disease? Oh, I am so worried! How did I get this personality disease? You don't have it do you? I need a nap.
Gramma says that I can nap tomorrow in the car. The car? We are going in the car? I do not enjoy rides, as she well knows, so why are we going in the car? Oh, I am going to see you. I can't wait! I will sleep in the car so that I don't see other cars whizzing by and making me feel sick in my stomach. Then I will wake up and you will be there. I can ride if I get to see you. It will be okay if I get to see you. Gramma said that we are going to meet you in Iowa and give Max to you.
Max is leaving? Oh, that's another reason to get in the car! I wasn't going to mention it, but he getting way too attached to Gramma! He thinks she is his mother! He needs to have a boy. I am okay with him having you for his boy, after all, you are the best boy a dog could have. I will trust you to take good care of a little puppy who misses his dog mother and his brothers and sisters.
Your first scared little puppy, Wall-E
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Sunday, October 16, 2011
I am not opposed to you having a new puppy, but how long will he be here? He cries a lot. Gramma says that he is lonely for his brothers and sisters. Do I have brothers and sisters? I don't remember that far back. I don't mind the crying so much, Gramma will pick him up and hold him. That's the part I don't like. She goes on and on about his puppy breath and how sweet he is and how cute he is. I do not care to hear this. And, if that isn't bad enough, Papa holds him, too!
All the people in the kampground think he is so cute. Then they say that he looks like me. That's okay. After all, if he looks like me and he is cute, then I am cute, too. And I was cute first.
Gramma took Max outside to play with all of us dogs. She was watching, so we had to be on our best behavior. I took this opportunity to get to know him. This is how dogs get to know each other. Emmy was ignoring him as much as she could.
While he was checking out something on the ground I sniffed his front end while the puppy called Toni watched. She was hoping he found something she could dig up. Gramma has been scolding her a lot. Gramma says she is running out of stepping stones to cover Toni's holes. I don't have a problem with the holes myself, but Gramma says that she could step in one and break her foot or her leg or her hip or even her arm. That would be bad for us dogs, cause then Papa would be in charge of taking care of us. I think I will have a long talk with Toni .........
Before I have that talk with Toni, I have to have talks with your puppy, Max, and teach him lots of stuff before you get him. This is a fire hydrant. Dogs like to pee on these. When I first came here, I was amazed that Oscar had his very own fire hydrant. Most dogs have to go for walks to find one, but ours is right there in our yard! For a long time Oscar let me think that Papa put that fire hydrant there just for him. I believed everything Oscar told me at first, even when he was teasing me. Emmy says that I was really gullible. I like that word, gullible. Your new puppy, Max, is gullible. I could have told him anything and he would believe me ............ but, I didn't.
He is cute, I suppose. He cries the same kind of tears I do!!
The puppy called Toni and I sat him down and told him some of Gramma's rules. We thought he was paying close attention, but he made a puddle on the floor as soon as we came in!
Toni still would like to play catch with your puppy. Gramma saw her sneaking up behind Max. "I am watching you, Toni, don't even think about pouncing on him!" said Gramma. She tried to say that she was not thinking that, but Gramma knows better .......... Gramma knows everything!
Gramma knows that I am missing you and thinking about you tonight. I promise to try to set a good example for your new puppy Max, who is very cute.
Your first cute dog, Wall-E
Saturday, October 15, 2011
Things around here were going just fine. The puppy called Toni was coming along with her training and not peeing in the floor as much. Gramma tells her what a good girl she is all the time. I don't suppose Gramma has seen all the holes she has dug in the back yard. I am enjoying having her to play with. I guess Gramma was right about me needing a companion to play with. Sometimes I try to act like I don't like her so much, but Gramma always knows what is best for me. Papa said so.
Oscar and Emmy are getting old and I did not realize just how much they sleep! I guess cause I was taking naps with them. Toni and I like to go outside and run round and round the yard. Emmy likes to lay in sun and sleep. Oscar refuses to go out unless he has to. Gramma says he is a lazy old man.
That cat that lives on the front porch, her name is Smokey or Spooky, depending on who you ask; well, she is very old and skinny! She likes to come inside and eat dog food. I personally don't have any objections, but Oscar is opposed to this. Gramma says that he is greedy and fat. I don't know what greedy is, but she is right about the fat part. Gramma doesn't want the cat to come inside because she gets sick when she eats our food and Gramma has to clean it up. That cat has a perfectly good house on the front porch, lined with a warm wool blanket. She has food and water, too. Gramma sees to that and Papa feeds her, too. So, I don't understand why that cat is so skinny.
But, that is not why I am writing this letter. Do you see this puppy? Gramma says that he looks like me. I don't think so. I have seen myself in a thing called a mirror. I barked until Gramma told me that I was barking at myself. I felt foolish when I realized that she was right. Gramma says that this white little puppy looks like me when I was a little puppy. Do you think so?
Gramma brought this puppy into our house and showed him to Oscar. He sniffed him, them glared at Gramma. I was outside and she brought him outside to see the rest of us dogs. Emmy took one look and turned her back to Gramma. This what she does when she is not happy with Gramma. The puppy called Toni wanted Gramma to toss the little white puppy across the yard so that we could chase him. She is really not all that smart, I tell you. Me? I thought that this was a visitor's puppy and that Gramma was just showing it to us.
I was wrong! Do you see this? Gramma is all huggy with this puppy, talking about the sweet smell of puppy breath. Oscar was so disgusted. Have I told you that he is not enchanted with the puppy called Toni? He merely tolerates her presence because he knows that Gramma will swat him if he tries to bite her. Emmy says that she will see if this new puppy would like to be groomed and Toni still was to chase it.
Gramma said that I had to write a letter so that you could see your new puppy! What? "No, I will not!" I said. Gramma explained that the little white puppy was homeless and that she thought he would like to live with you in Minnesota. She said that since he looked like me when I was a puppy that he would be the perfect little puppy for you. I was really upset until she explained this to me. I guess he does sort of look like me. He is really cute ..... like me. He does have puppy breath, I smelled it. So, I guess he should go live with you.
Gramma said he would need to sleep in a kennel. You know that I will not give up my safe house, right? Well, Gramma has a smaller kennel and he is sleeping in it right now. Gramma says that you will love this white puppy that needs a name. So, what will you name this white puppy that looks like me? Hurry and let us know. We can't keep calling him the puppy without a name!
Just remember that I was the very first puppy you loved, okay? I will always love you the best.
Your first dog, Wall-E
P.S. Hey, that's my blanket the puppy without a name is sleeping on!!
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
I have not been able to write for so long. Gramma is always busy these days. It is warm again and she goes out side to work on the gardens. It is okay. Us dogs go out, too. Well, except for Oscar. He likes to stay inside and nap. He is old, you know. Emmy is old, too, but she enjoys napping in the sun. Toni and I run and play.
The puppy called Toni is one strange creature, I tell you! Every time she hears Papa getting ice for his big bubba mug she runs to the door and cries. She likes ice! She acts like Papa is giving her a treat. She grabs this ice and goes off to eat it. She crunches it and won't share! So, the rest of us dogs thought we should have some of this ice, too.
I begged and Oscar begged. Emmy never begs, she just waits for someone to bring the treat to where she is ......... and they always do. Papa gave me this treat called ice. It was cold on my tongue! I had to spit it out and then Oscar grabbed it. I was going to just let him have it, but he spit it out, too. He said it made his teeth hurt. Papa offered us another piece of this ice, but we just left it there for the puppy called Toni. She ate them all and it was okay with us. Emmy did not eat her ice either. She has bad teeth.
I said that Emmy had bad teeth, but she doesn't have all of her teeth! Gramma said it was because she refused to let her brush them when she was young. Gramma has never even tried to brush mine! I have never seen Oscar get his brushed, either. Gramma brushes her teeth and Papa brushes his teeth. It make their breath smell minty fresh. I am not really sure what that means, but I heard it on TV. But, I was wondering why she was not brushing my teeth.
I don't want to lose my teeth like Emmy! Then I remembered that Gramma has this spray stuff she puts in our mouths, so I asked Oscar what that was. I like it, it tastes good and it doesn't hurt. She just lifts one side of our lips and sprays. That's all. She told us that it helps get the tartar off of our teeth. Is tartar bad? It must be if Gramma wants it gone!
Gramma says that my teeth look very healthy. She said that Oscar has healthy teeth, too. She said that he has always kept his teeth clean by chewing on his ball. That must be why Gramma does not scold him for chewing up his balls! The puppy called Toni must have the best teeth in the world ..... she chews up everything! Even ice!!
My time with Gramma is up, but always remember that I love you and to brush your teeth every day!
Your smiling dog, Wall-E
Saturday, September 10, 2011
The puppy called Toni is making Gramma crazy! She will go outside with all of us dogs. She even pees while she is outside, but when she comes back in she pees in the floor! Gramma keeps a bucket full of bleach water and she mops and mops. All day long! She scolds the puppy called Toni. But, she just wags her silly tail.
Gramma told Papa that she was sick of mopping. Sick of it!!
Monday, August 29, 2011
As you no doubt know, I do not have fleas, nor have I ever had fleas. I don't do fleas. Gramma doses me with special medicine so that I don't get fleas. I am not sure what fleas are, if you want to know the truth. Oscar told me that he has had them before, Emmy, too. They both told me that these fleas will bite you and make you itch like crazy. They told me that you can't stop scratching. They said it was as bad as when Gramma has poison ivy!
Well, last night, the puppy called Toni would not go to sleep. She was scratching and scratching and she was even biting herself! Oscar said that she was not actually biting her skin, but that she was trying to bite the fleas and kill them. You know, like when Gramma found that tick on me and she squeezed it until it popped. Poor Toni was miserable. So was Gramma. She kept telling Toni to be still. Finally we all got up and went outside to pee. When Gramma brought us back in I looked at her and begged with my eyes to be allowed to sleep in my kennel, cause Toni was keeping me awake. Oscar slept. Papa slept. But Gramma and Emmy could not sleep. When it was finally daylight, Gramma saw a flea on her arm .............. she woke everybody up!
She flipped the puppy called Toni over and told Papa that she was going to examine her under carriage (can't tell you what that is, cause I don't know). Toni tried to bite Gramma (never a good move) and Gramma spoke in her no-nonsense voice. Toni lay very still and Gramma announced that Toni had fleas! I was so scared! What would this mean for the puppy called Toni?? Why does the puppy called Toni have these fleas on her?
Gramma told Papa that it was just days away from our regular dose of Advantix and that the puppy called Toni had grown since she had been dosed. All of the fleas were around her tail and back legs, so she was pretty sure that she had not used the correct dose for the puppy called Toni. So, Papa said, why didn't she just put the right amount on her now. Papa is really silly if he thinks Gramma will miss an opportunity to give us dogs a bath! But, Gramma made Papa go get some special flea shampoo. We all got shampooed with the new shampoo and Gramma even shampooed her hair with it. Gramma really, really hates fleas!
But that is not the end of the flea cleaning. She washed all us dogs' blankets and pillows, too. I just had my kennel blanket smelling like sweaty feet again, too. Now it is April fresh, thanks to Toni for going out on an adventure and bringing home fleas. Emmy was quite happy to have a bath and Oscar says that you have to admit that it does make you feel better. I will tolerate these monthly washings of myself, but I really wish Gramma would leave my blankets alone!
I hope that the puppy called Toni has learned her lesson and will not escape on an adventure again! I hope you never get fleas on you! The fleas did not get on Papa, but they did get on Gramma. Papa said it was because Gramma was sweeter than him. I don't know about that; I have licked both of them and they both taste salty to me. Sometimes Gramma will put lotion on her hands and legs. Oscar likes to lick that, but I prefer just plain skin.
Be careful when you go exploring on adventures and look out for fleas!!!
Your flea-free dog, Wall-E
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Today is Sunday. Gramma closes early on Sunday and she is usually pretty tired. Today as she was locking up I noticed that the sky was clouding up. I was so excited! That meant rain and rain would mean that Gramma would want to sit on the couch with us dogs. I was pacing back and forth saying "Oh boy, oh boy, oh boy" while I heard the locks click into place. Gramma told us dogs to go out and do our business cause she thought a storm was coming. She put some kind of meat in the oven and said we would relax until dinner was done.
This sounded like a good idea to me. Gramma sat on the couch and I jumped up next to her. She was petting me and talking to me. Gramma and I communicate, as you know. Gramma told me that she had missed me lately. I have been spending a lot of time trying to train the puppy called Toni and Gramma has been very busy with the campground. So there we were, having some time together, just me and Gramma. Then a man tried to get into the store. Gramma said that if he could read road signs he could follow the directions on the door and use the after hours registration. Gramma said that she was tired. I agreed. Only, the man kept coming back and Gramma finally got up and opened the store. Then when she sat back down, the puppy called Toni jumped slap dab in the middle of us. We gave up.
Papa came in and Gramma pulled the delicious smelling meat out of the oven. She sat down with Papa and they ate dinner. She gave me a taste. She called it pork chops. I do not know what these pork chops are, but they made me lick my chops! I made a joke. Oscar said it was a lame joke. What do you think?
So, while I was still licking my chops, Gramma was looking around. "Where is Toni Louise?" asked Gramma. Papa said he did not know. Gramma said that the meal had been way too peaceful and she wondered what Toni was into. Either Gramma or Papa let the girl dogs out and forgot about them. When I am ready to come back inside I bark to let Gramma kn ow I am waiting at the door. Oscar scratches the door and then barks. Emmy sort of whimpers and then gets louder and louder. The puppy called Toni is rarely out by herself. She usually goes where ever I go. I am her favorite, you know. Well, tonight Toni went outside with Emmy. Gramma went to let them in .......... only, they were not in the yard!
Gramma was not happy. She marched through the house and told Papa that the girls had escaped! Oscar suggested that we try to knock the plates down from the counter to see if any pork chops were left. He said that as long as the girl dogs were already in trouble that Gramma wouldn't pay that much attention to us boy dogs. Really, I thought it was a bad idea. But, those pork chops were quite tasty. And Gramma would have her hands full with the puppy called Toni .........
We tried. Even though I am quite a remarkable jumper, I could not reach the counter. Oscar said I was pretty much useless as far as he was concerned. He told me that he wished my legs were longer. I wonder if he has noticed just how short his legs are! I am kind of glad that we could not get the plates. Toni was the first one to be found, but nobody could find Emmy. Gramma always worries about Emmy. She is so little, you know. And now that she is old, her eyes don't work as well and she doesn't hear so good. Her back makes her walk pretty slow and stiff, too. Gramma really loves her and would be very upset if she couldn't find her.
Gramma found Emmy in the back yard. Emmy will usually come back and try to act like she had been there the entire time. Gramma knows better. She scolded Emmy and told her that she had scared her. She held her for a long time after she found her. Toni got scolded by Papa and by Gramma. She just wagged her tail, though. You would have thought they told her she did something good! She is just not taking this training seriously.
I am pretty tired now. So is Gramma. We are going to bed. I hope that you had a nice Sunday. I hope that you did not get into any trouble. Maybe all the boys every where had a good day today! I love you, my boy.
Your faithful dog, Wall-E
Monday, August 22, 2011
We had an exciting weekend. Aunt Debbie came and spent the night with us and the fence keeps going up! Aunt Debbie did not bring Kiley with her. I was kind of bummed about that,but I got over it. She got to meet Toni Louise for the first time. I know you might be wondering if Toni behaved herself. She didn't. She peed in the floor, same as usual. Gramma scolded her, but really, Toni does not care! When Gramma scolds me, I feel bad and sometimes I even cry. I don't like it when Gramma is upset with me. Toni must think Gramma is just kidding.
But, that is not what I am writing about today. Gramma had to go into town and renew her driver's license. Oscar tells me that you must have one of these in order to drive a car. Gramma's had expired and she had to go take an eye test (I hope this did not hurt) and get a new picture. When she came home she told Papa that she had a regular photo shoot. This was scary. Why did they shoot her? She did not look like she had been shot! Emmy laughed at me and Toni. She told us that having a bunch of pictures taken was what you call a photo shoot. Well, if that is the case, then Gramma not only had a photo shoot, but she is a photo shooter!
As you can see in these pictures, I was sleeping peacefully in bed with Papa and the puppy called Toni. I like to take the cover that Gramma sleeps with and curve it around my body, just so, and then take a little nap while Papa sleeps in the morning. Papa and I do not care to get up as early as Gramma and Emmy. Oscar likes to sit with Gramma while she has coffee.
So, there we were, Toni on Gramma's pillow and me in her blanket. Suddenly there is a flash of light. I opened my eyes at first, then I shut them. There is really not much one can do to stop Gramma and her camera.
Finally the puppy called Toni stuck her tongue out at Gramma! Can you believe that?
Then she lay her head down and Gramma took the last picture and said, "Who could not love that face?" Seriously? I can think of two dogs right away. Oscar and Emmy. They don't really care for the puppy called Toni. I have to admit that I really like playing with her. She can be annoying, but we have lots of fun together.
The fence is almost done. They put a see-through fence up in our yard while they are working on the privacy fence. Us dogs need our yard so that we can go out and do our business (that is what Gramma calls it) whenever we need to. Gramma told Papa that the whole "walking on a leash thing" was not going to work while the store was open. You saw what happened in my last letter.
So, us dogs have been watching the man called Charlie work on our fence. At first we got really excited when we saw the big gap under the privacy fence. Oscar was the one who saw it first. He told the rest of us dogs that with just a little digging we could all escape and go into the park! We all stood there looking. We could see under the fence! We saw people in the pool swimming and others walking around. This was going to be great! We decided that the puppy called Toni should do the digging. Emmy volunteered to be the look-out and Oscar said he would lead us. We had a bit of an argument over this issue. I can run a lot faster than Oscar and told him that I should be the leader. I am also taller than Oscar ..........
We planned for three whole days. We would run into the woods by the tent sites and then work our way through the park. We would return for food, of course. Emmy said that the hole should be inconspicuous (that means hard to find) so that Gramma wouldn't notice it right away. Toni disagreed and asked how we would find our way back in if the hole was hard to find. Oscar looked at her with disgust and told her that she was definitely lacking in the hound genes. He said that we should just follow our own scents back.
I must say that I had not thought that far ahead. I was too busy worrying about Gramma discovering the plot. If it worked and we were not found out I would have such feelings of guilt that I would not be able to hide my distress. If Gramma discovered us gone, then she would send out a search party and we would all be in trouble. This scenario was equally distressing to me. Then I started to think about Gramma worrying about us dogs and I felt bad even more. I wanted to back out of the escape, but I was worried about what the others might think of me. What if one of us were injured? My tummy stared to hurt and before I could stop myself, I ate a bunch of grass and threw up! Oscar knew what I had been thinking and he made fun of me and I started to cry brown tears. When I went inside and Gramma saw me, she knew that something was wrong. She washed my tears off my white fur and held me. I knew then that I could not go through with the escape plans.
You will be happy to know that before I had to tell the others that I would not be joining them on their adventure the man called Charlie covered the gap between the fence and the ground with some things called landscape timbers. Not only are they too heavy for us dogs to move, but he secured them to the fence with screws. Oscar said that he could read the writing on the wall and knew that this was an idea of Gramma's. I have no idea where this wall with writing is, but I could not find it. Emmy confided to me that she had no intention of participating in the great escape and I told her that I would have stayed right here with her while Oscar and Toni went without us. Emmy said that in her younger days she had enjoyed many adventures with Louise, the Saint Bernard. She even confessed that after Louise broke her elbow that she had been the designated hole digger! This was before my time. Emmy has always been such a goody-goody around me. I see her in a whole new light now. Emmy told me that I was like Sarge, the Collie. She said that he was a worrier, too. He would always try to talk Louise out of escaping, but she was stubborn and willful. I suppose this is why the puppy called Toni is the puppy called Toni Louise!
Gramma told me that you said you missed me while you were talking to her. Same here, my boy. I will always be missing you when you are not here with me. You are, after all, my boy! I know that you are busy getting ready to go back to school. Gramma says that you will be in the second grade this year. I am very proud to be the dog of a second grader!
Your loving dog, Wall-E
Thursday, August 11, 2011
I don't know what is going on around here. Our fence is down! So now when we have to go outside I have to wear this thing called a harness and Gramma attaches a leash to it. Oscar and I used to wear choke chains whenever Gramma took us somewhere, but we kept pulling too hard and Oscar would cough and cough. Gramma said that it was annoying, so she got us these harnesses. Oscar got the blue one. We wear the same size, me and Oscar. I wanted the green , cause it is your favorite color. Gramma knows that, so she had already saved it for me.
The puppy called Toni still has the collar that she came with and she even has a leash that is brown and pink. Emmy says this color combination is very stylish. "It's a leash," I said, "who cares?" Then she reminded me that I was very particular about the color of my harness. I suppose she has a point. Emmy has the harness and leash that Gramma made just for her. It is pink gingham (whatever that means) and it has little alphabet beads that spell out her name. She is such a girl.
Okay, when walking with a person with a leash attached to you, there are certain rules that must be obeyed. It is not a good idea to chase your own tail in circles. Even if you are the only dog being walked. You will end up with the leash wrapped around your own feet. Oh, and the number one rule when walking with Gramma ........... never run around Gramma, winding the leash around her legs. It will not end well. Gramma will not like it.
The leashes will look like this! And that is with only one dog not following the rules of walking on a leash!
Emmy chose to separate herself from the rest of us. I wish I had thought of that. Emmy did not want to get hurt or trampled by the puppy called Toni. Gramma finally just picked Emmy up and carried her. She said that I was too heavy. Oscar, too. I wish she had just carried Toni, since the rest of us know what to do. Gramma said this was a learning experience for the puppy called Toni. Oscar said he would like to teach her a lesson or two. He is not all that fond of the puppy called Toni. He will not tolerate any body else outside our family mistreating her, but he has nipped her quite a few times.
I thought learning was supposed to be fun. This learning experience for the puppy called Toni was not fun. I am glad it is over and I hope the fence is finished very soon. Come to think of it, do you suppose Toni's love of digging is why the fence is being repaired? I wish you were here, I could really use your help with this puppy called Toni!
Your learning dog, Wall-E
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
No pictures of this adventure, my boy, but I will tell you what happened. Gramma killed a snake!!!! Yes she did! She was getting a bundle of wood for a camper and she picked up a piece of the wood and there it was ........ a snake, just laying there looking at her. Us dogs listened to the whole story while she told Papa about it. Papa was not here, that is why Gramma was getting the wood. I suppose Papa would have found the snake if he had been here; but only if he picked up the exact same piece of wood that Gramma picked up. What are the chances of that? That snake could still be there, waiting to .............
I have a confession. I don't even know what a snake is, or what it does. Why did Gramma kill the snake? It must be bad if Gramma wanted to kill it. I have heard her say, "Toni, I am going to kill you!" when the puppy called Toni chews on her shoes. Chewing up shoes and magazines is not a good thing. Gramma gets really mad at the puppy called Toni, but she doesn't really kill her. So, I wonder what this snake did to make Gramma actually kill it.
I listened to Gramma tell Papa that this snake coiled up and struck at her. By that time Oscar had informed me that a snake is a reptile that slithers on the ground because it has no arms or legs. So, now I am confused, how could this snake strike out at Gramma with no arms? Or legs? Papa asked how big the snake was and what kind. Gramma said it was small, no bigger around than a pencil and that she was pretty sure it was a moccasin. Oscar said that this was not good. I had already figured that much out! He said that this is a poisonous snake and that a bite from this snake could kill! Kill Gramma! Oh no, that can't happen. She takes care of us dogs. I know that Papa helps, but he is not as good at it as Gramma is.
Come to think of it Gramma takes care of Papa, too. Things would not go well if we lost Gramma. Papa takes short cuts on a lot of things. He never even rinses our water dish, much less wash it. He just adds water to what is already there. I don't know if you know this, but us dogs actually stick our tongues in the water to drink. Some times the puppy called Toni still has food on her tongue and it gets in the water. Gramma told me that humans call this backwash and that is why they don't like to drink after small children. I prefer to have Gramma fill our dish. She takes it to the sink and washes it out and then puts fresh cold water in it. Papa just grabs a cup or a glass or a bowl off the counter and puts water in it, then dumps it in our bowl. If he drops an ice cube he will toss that in, too. All the food particles in the bottom of the bowl swirl to the top .......... not very thirst quenching!
But, this is about snakes. Papa says that it sounded like a baby mocassin and Gramma said that is what she thought, too. I thought Gramma was very fond of babies, but I guess snakes don't qualify. Gramma told Papa that she wanted the wood pile cleaned up and restacked where there is no grass. She does not like the fact that there could be more babies waiting in the wood pile to strike out at her! Papa asked what she killed the snake with and she told him that she smashed the snake with another piece of firewood and that this was the very first snake she had ever killed! Usually when Gramma sees a snake she yells for Papa, but he wasn't here and she said she was afraid that the snake would slither under the fence and into our yard. Our yard? Where us dogs play? Oscar was alert at once and said he could kill a snake. Emmy told me if I ever see one I should just stay away from it. This is a good idea ..... except that I have no idea what a snake looks like. Emmy told me to just think about a worm on steroids. I did. I thought it was pretty funny, too. Emmy warned me to not make light of this issue, that even a very small snake could make me very, very sick and might even kill me.
So, promise me that you will never, ever pick up a snake, okay? I will leave them alone, too. I also told Oscar that he should leave the snake killing to Gramma and Papa. Gramma seemed quite proud of herself after killing this snake full of poison. Papa says that there are good snakes as well as bad snakes. Gramma told him that the only good snake was a dead snake. I think that she was making a joke, or maybe not. She didn't laugh.
Gramma said she wished she had her camera when she saw the snake, but that she probably would not have taken a picture until he was dead. Gramma is very careful, you know. I will be very careful, too, my boy. I must go now, Gramma wants me to go outside with the puppy called Toni. Toni likes to play and Gramma wants me to make her very tired for a nap. I can do that.
Your helpful dog, Wall-E
Saturday, August 6, 2011
Toni acts like nothing ever happened to her and things are back to normal around here. Toni gets into all kinds of trouble. She really likes to tear papers to shreds. I never did that, did I? Emmy reminded me that I chewed up two pairs of Gramma's shoes. That was a long time ago and I have matured nicely. Gramma told me so.
Did you see that I now have 25 followers!! Gramma says that I am a very popular dog. Gramma says that I should not get a big head about this. I do not know what that means. My head is as big as it will ever be. I am pretty sure that if my head starts to grow, it would mean that something is very wrong. Why does she say these things to me?
Gramma has been moving all of the food out of one freezer into another. Seems like a silly thing to do. She told Papa that she needed to defrost the big one. Papa left the house to work outside in the park. I wish I had gone with him, because Gramma is not happy about this defrosting thing. I don't know why, since it was her idea. She told Papa to move out of her way when he came in to get some ice. She said that there were some things that could not be saved and she has made several trips out to the dumpster. Us dogs were hoping she might drop something on her way out, but she didn't. We figured Toni could rip into the packaging and then we could all check it out. Gramma is too careful! Maybe Papa will come back in and help. He is sure to drop something.
I think that I will go find that kong that Gramma filled with peanut butter and hide it in my kennel. All the other dogs are sleeping now. I am very clever, don't you think?
Your clever dog, Wall-E
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Toni came home. Finally. She is right behind this door. I can smell her. I can hear her. I can hear Gramma talking to her. Gramma is talking very softly and telling her that everything will be alright. Everything will be alright?? What is she talking about? I have tried to jump high enough to touch that door knob, but even when I touch it, I find that I cannot turn it and open the door!
Toni stayed in the store with Gramma. Gramma said she was still goofy from the stuff they gave her at the vet. Gramma let me take a peek and I did not think she looked goofy .........
Later when Toni came in the house she told us that she slept while she was gone and that when she woke up, Papa was there. She said she was really happy to see Papa, cause she thought that she was going to go live in another place. She said this had happened to her before. All of us dogs felt bad for her. Even Emmy was nicer to her.
You will be as relieved as I am to know that even though Papa came back without the puppy called Toni, he is going to go back and get her at 3:00. Gramma asked how Toni did on the ride and Papa said she yakked in the truck. It is okay, I have seen the inside of Papa's truck. A little dog yak will fit right in. But ......... why did she throw up? Was she sick, does she have a puppy disease? Is that why Papa took her?
Gramma asked Papa what the puppy called Toni did when he handed her over. Handed her over??? To who? This is not sounding good to me. Papa said they put her in a cage. Wait, did I hear that right? A cage? I wanted to go get Oscar, but I could not leave the sofa in case I missed something. Oscar was eating. Gramma put all of our dog dishes up last night. I don't know why. Anyhow, Papa said that Toni kept looking at him from the cage with a sad face. Gramma was sad, too. She said that Toni probably thought that she was back at the pound. This just keeps getting worse.
Then Papa said that he would be going back to get her at 3:00. Then he went out to fix some plumbing and I ran to tell Oscar what I had heard. Oscar was appalled that they had put our puppy in a cage! He told me that if not for the fact that Papa was going back to get her, we would be planning a rescue! I did not point out the fact that we still did not know exactly where she was. I have learned that although Oscar is very brave and will stand up to anyone, he is also a big talker. Let's keep that between the two of us. I would not want him to know I said that. He is very strong, I think I could outrun him, but he can be very determined when you make him mad.
I will no doubt write another update when Toni comes home and I can get her side of this story. I think I heard Gramma say something about surgery, too. I don't want to talk about that ...... I might be sick if I do. I don't even like to have my nails cut!
Your reporter dog, Wall-E
Friday, July 29, 2011
Do you see this? This used to be a package of napkins .......... We tried to tell her, but she simply would not listen. Gramma was working in the store and the rest of us dogs were napping when I heard a rustling sound. I came out of my kennel and this is what I saw. I sniffed and sure enough I could smell the smell of that puppy called Toni. She had ripped the plastic off and pulled all the napkins out. She even shredded some of those napkins!
Oscar chuckled and told me that this reminded him of some of the shenanigans I used to get into. I am sure I never, ever shredded a package of napkins. I think Oscar is just getting old and his memory is not what it used to be.
As you, yourself know, Gramma does not like shenanigans. I heard her opening the door from the store and I went to my kennel, lest she think I was responsible for this mess ......
TONI COME HERE. I heard Gramma shout. Oscar and Emmy were watching from their basket and I was watching from my kennel. She went prancing over to Gramma without a care in the world and looked up at her. She didn't even look scared or sorry for what she had done!
Gramma took her to the mess and asked her if she had done this dreadful deed. She tried to jump into Gramma's arms, but Gramma was having none of that. I could have told her that would not work, but she needs to learn this on her own ............. just like I did. She got a swat from the fly swatter and another one later when she thought it would be a good idea to attack the broom while Gramma was cleaning up.
I guess I like her okay now. We have been playing together and she is tireless, let me tell you. She can run as fast as me and her legs are freaky long. We play fight, too. I taught her how to sit pretty. I know you are very proud of me for doing this. Gramma says that I am a very smart dog. I am smart because I have the best boy in the world, right?
Your smart dog, Wall-E
Thursday, July 21, 2011
This new puppy called Toni will be my undoing! I have managed to convince her that she is not allowed in my kennel. Can you believe that Gramma suggested I let her have my kennel to sleep in. That is where I draw the line! It is true that Oscar and Emmy sometimes take a little nap with me in my kennel .......... but it is by invitation only. That means that you can't come in unless I say so! And I do not say that the puppy called Toni can enter my kennel. I have already nipped her to let her know and she is staying away from my kennel that holds my treasures.
This puppy called Toni has already done so many bad things. She has chewed on Papa's shoes! I shudder to think that she could chew on your old shoes that I sleep with when I need comfort. She walks all over the tables in the living room and yesterday she knocked a lamp down. Did she get in big trouble? No. Can you believe it?
Gramma was hanging out clothes yesterday and she saw this puppy called Toni digging a hole!! She dug until she had water in the hole and the mud was flying everywhere. Gramma hollered, "NO, Toni, BAD GIRL!!!!!" I got out of the way, so I could watch. I must confess that this was making me quite happy, since she had already gotten me in trouble when she smeared mud on my back. This crazy puppy called Toni stopped, and still standing in the mud hole, she just looked at Gramma with her goofy look. She was not scared at all, she even wagged her tail. Then she just started digging again. Gramma clapped her hands and asked this silly puppy if she had a death wish. Boy, I was really enjoying this. Then she gave her a shake and told her no again. Gramma covered the hole with a big steeping stone and then she looked at me and told me she was sorry for scolding me about the mud! She said she knew it was not my fault. Oh, my boy, was I ever happy!
Just look at this puppy called Toni. Her face is all muddy and she just had a bath! Look at the arm of the chair. Gramma was not very happy with this puppy called Toni.
Look at Oscar's eye! She swiped him with her muddy paw. Don't worry, he is okay, Gramma cleaned his eye.
Okay, I did play with her. But, I did not have fun! It just looks like I was having fun, that's all.
This all happened yesterday and we all got a bath last night. Then, this morning while Gramma was outside painting a sign and Papa forgot to latch the gate ........... this puppy called Toni got into the bathroom trash can! Oscar does this sometimes when Papa fails to latch the gate that keeps us dogs out of the bedroom and bathroom. This makes Gramma mad. She told Papa that this is the only thing she expects him to do in the morning. She said an ounce of prevention equals a pound of cure. Why does she say these things?
Emmy told me that it just means that it only takes a second for Papa to secure the gate, but it takes 10 minutes for Gramma to clean up the mess. Well, let me tell you, this puppy called Toni made a really big mess! She ripped the liner to shreds and tore up everything into tiny pieces. When Gramma saw this I thought Toni would get a swat with the fly swatter for sure, but Gramma was mad at Papa!!
I was listening when Gramma read those papers from the animal shelter and I heard her say that we have 30 days to try this puppy called Toni in our house and if things don't work out we can take her back. It has only been three days and I volunteer to ride along to take her back!!
Do we really have to have her the whole 30 days? I wish I could see you, my boy. Together we could figure this out. I played with two boys yesterday. Alan came into the store to see the puppy called Toni, but he liked me the best. Really, he did. Then Benjamin came to see me with his Papa. I know his Papa, his name is Crazy Tom (I think that might be his Indian name). I jumped into the air and gave Benjamin a kiss! He reminded me of you.
I must go nap now. This puppy called Toni is very tiring. I will be dreaming of you, my boy. Don't forget that I love you.
Your best dog, Wall-E
Tuesday, July 19, 2011
This new puppy got in the bed with Gramma and Papa last night. I did not like it one bit .... no, I did not! Papa was playing the game he usually plays with me with that puppy called Toni. I hate her. I do, I am not kidding. She is annoying. Always running and jumping and playing. I just hate her. She will come up to me and try to engage me in play. She will hold her paw up and wave it at me. I just walk away, but she follows me and won't leave me alone.
She slept all night, right in our bed with all of us dogs. I know she is a dog, too, but this was our bed with Gramma and Papa. I do not want to share. I want it to just be us three dogs. I was quite content, I tell you! Gramma told Toni that she was a good girl just because she slept all night. Whatever, I sleep all night all the time. Does she tell me I am good just for doing what I am supposed to do anyway? No!
Toni, the puppy with puppy breath peed in the floor! Oh boy, I thought she was in for it, but Gramma just mopped it up and showed it to her and told her "no-no, we go outside to pee". If I pee in the floor she scolds me! Gramma was mopping and Toni put her paws on the side of the bucket to look in and Gramma said she was so cute. She called Papa to look at Toni look at the mop water. Disgusting! It is not like she caught a frisbee, is it? Then , she went outside and peed and Gramma clapped and petted her like crazy and told her what a good little girl she was. I said big deal for her .... I pee outside all the time. Then when the stupid little dog with puppy breath came in the house she was running and couldn't stop. She slid into the water dish and tipped it up and was wet all over. Gramma laughed!!! I am not kidding, she laughed. She picked Toni up and showed her to Papa.
Oscar and Emmy have been making fun of me and calling me jealous. I am not jealous! I just do not like this dog called Toni with puppy breath, that's all. Oscar says that I used to act just like this puppy. Did I? I do not remember being so annoying, I just wanted to play, that's all. I was never so annoying, was I? I don't like seeing this dog in Gramma's lap or in Papa's lap, that's all. I am glad that you are not here. I do not think I could bear it if you held this dog called Toni with puppy breath. Everybody keeps telling her she is so cute. I do not find her to be cute at all. She is just an annoying little dog with long legs and puppy breath. Oh, about the puppy breath ..... what is the big deal with that?
All puppies have puppy breath and I had puppy breath when I was a puppy, so big deal! I want to be the youngest dog here! But I am not jealous, I tell you. Really, I am not! I wish I could just go stay with my boy, that's all.
Your NOT jealous dog, Wall-E
Monday, July 18, 2011
Gramma has been going on and on about puppy breath and how great it is. She has been telling Papa that we need a puppy. She says that we need this puppy for me. What? Why do I need a puppy? I am perfectly happy being the youngest dog here. Why, oh why would I want a puppy to come in and take Gramma and Papa's love from me? They already tried this with that bloodhound, Zeke, and we all know how well that turned out.
Gramma has been showing Papa pictures of puppies and asking what he thinks. Papa and I will look and Papa will say, "We don't need another dog." I could not agree more! But, last week Gramma saw a picture of a puppy right here in our city and she looked like Emmy. Papa was quite taken with the image of this dog and when Gramma told him that the animal shelter was over crowded, he went to take a look at this little dog that held such a likeness to our Emmy. This dog was said to be a mix between a dachshund and a chihuahua ............ a chiweenie! Her face looked like Emmy, but her ears were sticking up like mine.
I suppose you know that he came home with her. She is kind of cute. She doesn't look as much like Emmy in person as she did in the picture, though. She has puppy breath and Gramma is all smitten with her, letting her give her lots and lots of kisses. I confess that I do not like it when Gramma or Papa hold this new dog with her puppy breath. Gramma is calling her Toni. Because we have Oscar and Emmy, she said we need a Toni. How come I am not named after an award?
Gramma reminded me that I was named by my boy and that I am the only dog here with his very own boy. I am special. Gramma calls me Wall-E, the wonder dog! Okay, I feel much better now. I have my very own blog so that I can write letters to you. And Toni is my new playmate. She is kind of cute, don't you think?
She is taller than me, this new dog named Toni with puppy breath. Her legs are freakishly long ..... Gramma said so. She can jump really high and she chases me! Gramma says her bark is as high pitched and annoying as mine! I have to teach her things. Like how to catch a frisbee and how to take Oscar's ball and not get bitten. Emmy does not care for this new dog. She won't even sniff her puppy breath!
I must go now, I heard Gramma say something about our monthly bath and that Toni arrived just in time ............. I think it is time to show her some hiding places, don't you?
I will be thinking about you as I get my bath tonight. I have not forgotten our deal to to behave while we get our baths and showers.
Your faithful dog, Wall-E